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Men and Mental Health
There’s a crisis among men right now, and some of the statistics we’re seeing are pretty shocking. American men are now four times more likely to commit suicide than women. They are five times more likely to develop substance abuse problems, and unfortunately, this issue seems to be getting worse and worse. Clearly, something needs to be done, but in order to provide men the help they need, we first need to understand how they got to this point of suffering. Here are my thoughts on how to help men with their mental health.
We’re Not Making as Much
Traditionally, men were providers. This has changed dramatically. Now, most households have dual incomes. While it’s great that women have been able to achieve so much financial success, what we’ve seen is that men have now fallen quite far behind. Although there is still a gap in overall pay, this is mostly reflective of disparities between men and women in the one percent. The truth is that the average American man is less employed, and the jobs he is able to secure often pay less. Particularly, jobs that involve manual labor have become less financially solvent.
We’re Not as Educated
Men are now also less educated than women. Women make up the majority of university populations across the country. As we know, education is one of the key pathways to economic and social success. The less educated you are, the less likely you are to succeed in almost all areas of your life.
We Don’t Have a Role
Men and women in the past had very prescriptive gender roles. I think we’re all glad to see that shift. It’s freeing to feel as though I do not have to express myself in such a strict way simply because I’m a man. But many men feel as though their role in society has been almost entirely stripped away. Most men were taught to believe that they should derive their self-esteem from their ability to accomplish.
How to Help Men
So what do we do? For one, we need to encourage men to take care of their emotional well-being. This goes beyond just telling men it’s okay to cry now and then. We need to encourage one another to engage in consistent mental health practices, whether that’s therapy, exercise, a spiritual community, etc. In my experience, men have a tendency to go to therapy once or twice before declaring, “I’m good,” and quitting prematurely. We need to give ourselves permission to get help consistently. We’ve been conditioned our whole lives to believe our feelings are unacceptable—unless we’re angry. So when we feel fragile, insecure, or small, most men feel an immense sense of shame.
Celebrating Masculinity
Masculinity is just as beautiful as femininity. It’s okay if some men want to be tough. Our natural drive for competition and domination is what has propelled societies forward. Sure, unchecked aggression can be very toxic, but we wouldn’t survive without any of it. Our culture thrives on balance. When one group struggles, we all struggle. No one should be left behind.
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