Perfectionism looks great, but feels terrible.
Therapy & Coaching for Gay Men
You probably deal with a lot of shame.
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That's because you grew up in a family, culture and society that told you that you weren't enough. That there was a part of you that was inherently flawed and unacceptable. As a result, you likely developed coping mechanisms to tolerate this shame. You may have developed perfectionism, trying to make yourself as palatable as possible to others. You have have developed unhealthy coping mechanisms to numb yourself to feeling low self-worth.
You don't have to live like this anymore.
I focus specifically on providing psychotherapy to gay men in my practice. In therapy, I can help you to re-discover and celebrate your authentic self. Below are some of the most common themes I see.
Internalized Homophobia
You have built a successful and satisfying life. You have a thriving career, great friends and exciting travel opportunities. But, despite all of this, you still feel a sense of shame. You still still struggle to fully accept yourself & feel confident.
Substance Use
You met up with a guy on Grindr. He asks you if you like to 'party and play.' You’ve heard of the dangers, but you decide to throw caution to the wind—just this once. Now, several months later, you’ve developed a drug habit. You desperately want to quit, but you can’t seem to do so on your own.
Sex
You’ve just begun dating someone that you’re really clicking with. You want to initiate sex, but you’re nervous. You don't feel comfortable with intimacy. You're not sure how to express your sexual needs in a direct, healthy way.
Queer Trauma
Growing up, you didn't fit in with the other boys. You were teased and bullied for being effeminate. You may have been outed for your perceived sexuality before you even know you were gay yourself. Now, you still find yourself on high-alert in predominately straight environment.
Low Self-Esteem
You join a gym to start developing the ideal body you want. On your first day you walk in and you see tons of other gay men with perfect bodies. You immediately feel overcome with insecurity and a sense of defeat.
Anxiety
After a long day accomplishing a host of important tasks, you look forward to a night in relaxing. But you can't. Your mind races with worry and you're flooded with tension and restlessness.
LGBTQ+ FAMILY PLANNING
There are very specific nuances when it comes to family planning for LGBTQ+ identified parents.
For us, the process is just different.
The beautiful thing is that we create our families with so much intention and purpose.
It is essential that you connect with resources that celebrate LGBTQ+ folks. I can help connect you with local fertility, surrogacy and adoption services that will affirm your needs. This is particularly important as the laws for adoption and surrogacy vary by state.
I can help you navigate your emotional health as you walk through this milestone.
Michael Pezzullo, LMFT
Schedule your first session:
8271 Melrose Ave.
Suite 105
Los Angeles, CA 90046
213-640-9788